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At times, I want to slip back into old
behavior and ignorance, but my awakened responsibility will not let me go there.

If I do not see it, I can get away with doing it. But once a pattern, a behavior is
revealed to me… I feel called to take action…. to be responsible.

In college, I used to invent such elaborate stories… lies… to cover my not showing
up for class, not doing my work. They professors would always buy the story and I,
on some twisted level, loved my creative skill to get me out of a bind.

Now, I cannot sugar coat things knowingly. I see it plainly for what it is, and I
recognize that lying will lead me down a slippery, dangerous slope.

I have discovered that my ego has gotten pretty clever at hiding things from myself.
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